By Bob Groeneveld/Langley Advance Times
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If you’d asked her 10 years ago, Ellie O’Brien would have told you that the thing she feared most was that she would get so sick that it would impact her family to the core.
“Never once did I think my son would get cancer,” said O’Brien.
“Today, she said, “the one fear I have is that I won’t let the people around me know how important they are to me.”
Her thoughts on dealing with her son’s cancer and later her own inspired O’Brien to write a book, TWICE: Unpacking Two Journeys Through Cancer, which she completed last fall.
O’Brien is not her real name, but a pen name she chose to protect her family’s privacy.
She had started writing the book in 2014, just a year after her son was diagnosed with Stage 3 Wilms kidney tumour, “but it was too painful to finish.”
“It was a difficult time for our family,” she said.
Then, only two years after her son’s treatments were completed, she received the hard news that she had a form of breast cancer, Invasive Ductal Carcinoma, Stage 2.
“I was 41 at the time and was shocked, since breast cancer doesn’t run in my family,” she said.
She was also worried about the prospects of chemotherapy.
“Since we had just faced our son’s cancer, “ she said, “The impact of chemotherapy on a family was still quite recent for me.”
She spoke with other women who had faced breast cancer to get some advice. One had taken an aggressive surgical approach and was able to avoid chemotherapy and radiation entirely.
“In October 2015, I sought out her surgeon and opted for a double mastectomy and had reconstruction at the same time,” she said.
Her oncologist expressed surprise at her wish for such an aggressive approach, and still recommended chemotherapy.
“He heard my concerns,” she said, “and sent a tissue sample away to determine how aggressive my cancer was, and fortunately it had a low rating to reoccur.”
She was soon cleared from cancer.
Hers was a “short journey through cancer,” but she felt her story was an important one to share.
“I hope my story sheds light on the tensions families face and offers hope to other people facing cancer,” she said.
The Canadian Cancer Society predicts that one in two people will get a cancer diagnosis in their lifetime, and that cancer rates will increase substantially in the next decade.
“Although a cancer diagnosis is not easy,” she said, “I’ve learned that more cancers are curable and that more people are living longer with cancer. It’s not the death sentence that it once was.”
She added, “You might be surprised to learn there are some beneficial effects of cancer. I don’t sweat small stuff like I used to. I love deeper, and mostly, I see things in a different way. I know life can change in an instant.”
She was encouraged to apply to be a TEDx speaker at the upcoming TEDxLangleyED event on Saturday, April 6th, at the Chief Sepass Theatre in Fort Langley.