The Penticton and Area Cycling Association has raised almost $40,000 to fund the creation of a pump track. (File photo) Danny Halmo is an advocate of Langley’s cycling community. Black Press photo

Letter: Sorry, not sorry for being a happy cyclist

Editor: As an electric vehicle Guinness World Record setter and avid member of the fastest growing demographic in cycling, the middle aged white male:

I would like to formally apologize to all you poor rich entitled brats who seem to despise the horrible inconvenience we have inflicted upon you.

People who complain about our environmental stewardship, and slower, healthier pace and lifestyles that so clearly threaten your get- the- heck- out- of- my- way- I’m- in- a- hurry- and- more- important-than-you way of life.

So pardon us for being happy that any council does this to you and for you so ingraciously sacrificing a part of your high speed multi-lane thoroughfare, just so we can have the peace of mind and safety of a shared, raised or extra wide painted pathway, so as to not be worried about getting hit in the back of the helmet by the trailer mirror of some distracted driving airhead driving a duelie to go get groceries.

And far be it from us to denounce your lack of concern for the environment for driving said three ton diesel belching behemoth for purposes other than delivering animal feed or pulling a trailer, as it was intended for.

And let’s not forget that there are laws requiring you to give us one metre when passing, to check your mirrors when opening your doors, and that honking a horn at us only strengthens our resolve to keep on pissing you off. (EDIT: Making your day)

And by the way, you fossil fuel burning fossil, oil is the sun’s excrement, the oil reserves are its septic tank, a gasoline engine is not an electric motor, and you can’t even start one of yours without one of ours.

Meanwhile, we hope you don’t mind as we are going to continue to live cleaner, healthier lifestyles so that perhaps one day, we will all live long enough to actually pay off our overpriced mortgages.

And by the way, Montreal leads Canada in cycling implimentation and usage, so if we really want to be the greenest city in the world by 2020, then you premium elitist engine heads are really gonna lose it.

Have a nice day and happy cycling everyone!

Danny “Hurricane” Halmo,

Langley

Just Posted

SASSY finalists impress judges

Nominees ‘have a maturity beyond their years’

Draft business case for Surrey-Langley SkyTrain to be ready July 25

The Mayors’ Council on Regional Transportation heard a progress update Thursday

Suspect stole lingerie in Langley heist

Langley RCMP is also looking for someone who bought $6,000 in goods with a stolen credit card

Smuggler’s Inn owner, charged with smuggling people into Canada, granted bail

Robert Joseph Boule ordered to turn away anyone indicating a plan to enter Canada illegally

Campaign for terminally ill Langley boy nears goal

Fundraiser to send eight-year-old on a cruise with his family

VIDEO: Large dust devil swirls through town in B.C.’s interior

Residents look on as column climbs about 90 feet into the air

Port Moody mayor accused of sexual assault has first court appearance

Rob Vagramov’s case was adjourned to May 29

Two victims of Aldergrove deck collapse still in intensive care, family says

Close relative Satwant Garcha makes daily trips to visit those injured at the wedding

RCMP arrest B.C. man following threatening Vaisakhi Facebook post

Post made reference to pressure cooker bomb at massive Surrey parade

Second dump site of Dungeness crab discovered in northern B.C.

DFO confident new site related to larger April 2 dump

Northern B.C. high school student reaches 100,000 followers on YouTube

Voice actor, animator, Jericho Fortune has more than 30-million views on his channel GTAGAMER222

Handcrafted paper gowns on display in Vancouver

Langara students designs inspired by esigners such as Versace, Dior and Gucci

University mourns student who died in B.C. canoeing accident

Andrew Milner, 19, was in his second year with the University of Calgary’s basketball program

Most Read