The stages of home renovations (ironically similar to the stages of grief only with fewer Kleenex):
1. Elation: When the sledgehammer starts to swing, most people are excited to be rid of that (fill in the blank). For me it was a big list: fake cedar laminate flooring, the 1991 cabinets with delaminating door fronts, laminate kitchen flooring with lots of glue stains/marks, a 57-inch bathtub, brown porcelain tile… Notice the desire to delaminate my home.
2. Depression: Most of this stuff made with sawdust glued together and plastic coverings is destined for the landfill.
3. Denial and isolation: See first article on my renos about basically feeling like I was camping in my own house (March 23 or online). But it’s all good, right?
4. Anger: Have you heard of this thing called the internet? Sure it’s great for doing research on aspect of a home reno, but no matter how much research, there’s nothing like actually touching the product.
Yet even an average schmuck like me can be taken. I know, hard to believe. I’m a bit of a, call it what you will – bargain hunter, scrounger, cheapskate, whatever. So I tried to invest in decent quality, mid-grade plumbing fixtures. But once you take the stuff out of the box, you discover that even a $177 bathroom faucet is still made with plastic parts.
5. Acceptance: Everyone knows this one. Renos always take longer than expected. Moving on.
6. Confusion: Some of the things you picture in your head turn out looking great once installed. Antique white cabinets with green kitchen walls gives me the vintage look I want. So why can’t I figure out what colour to paint the bathroom?
7. Elation: We circle back around to the starting point. Once certain benchmarks are hit – the installation of my 72-inch bathtub, the installation of cupboards and a kitchen sink with water and drains, the laying down of flooring so I didn’t have to wear shoes all the time, even new paint in the kitchen – that felt like progress.
The final installment of my home reno adventures is in May’s Home and Gardens section.