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Letter: NDP supporters dream of world without petroleum

Editor: I watched with great interest the NDP convention in Edmonton — a city that just happens to be centre of the Canadian oil industry. It was the one where they threw their leader under the bus in the hope that Bernie Sanders will miraculously leave the US election campaign and arrive here in the Great White North to take over leadership of the party.

Bernie would lead the party in the glorious signing of the leap manifesto and we would all go to bed with a sigh of relief that the world could be a better place.

I wonder how many of these good folks refused the use of petroleum-based products such as gasoline for their cars and kerosene for the jets to get them to and from the convention.

I can’t wait for the next convention in Winnipeg. The members that support the leap manifesto have just enough time to build solar powered cars, buses and planes to get them to the convention. I happen to have a set of plans to build methane gas bags for pig manure to drive engines, but alas, the engines needs dirty petroleum for lubrication.

The purest NDP-ers that have rejected the notion of the world requiring petroleum can drive on hand sawed wooden wheels from trees that died peacefully of old age. Heaven forbid they drive on asphalt roads made from dirty petroleum.

Pork-belly shares should skyrocket as they lubricate the axles with pork lard every five miles like the pioneers of wagon trains crossing the prairies in the 1800s.

This will be the mother of all conventions. The supporters arriving tired and dusty after months of walking, peddling and driving on wooden wheels over dusty dirt roads to put the final nail in the coffin of the nasty petroleum industry and its pipelines, once and for all.

They will all join hands with Bernie and sing that the world is now a better place. Now, where do they find trees that died of old age in Manitoba, that are big enough to carve a new set of wheels to get home?

Alas, all is well in Bernieville and we all sleep in peacefully knowing that the manifesto has saved us and the world from use of nasty petroleum.

Ron Sloan,

Langley