Plumbers are expensive.
I remind myself of that every time I consider getting started on a new do-it-yourself project, like replacing a drippy tap or installing a new shower or running a water line out to the garden for the greenhouse.
But they’re worth every penny of it.
I remind myself of that every time I’m halfway through a new do-it-yourself project and discover the second half of the job is going to take 10 times the effort and 20 times the time as the first half.
There are really only two basic, natural laws of do-it-yourself plumbing, although with appended corollaries.
The First Natural Law of DIY Plumbing: Nothing new fits on anything old.
The first corollary to Law 1: Nothing from one brand of plumbing fixtures fits to anything from another brand.
The second corollary is – and this is the most important thing to remember before you get started on any do-it-yourself plumbing project – nothing fits to anything else.
The third corollary is, you will have to re-tighten every joint in your project at least three times before they stop leaking.
After you have all your tools and parts in hand and feel you are ready to proceed with your project, the Second Natural Law of DIY Plumbing kicks in: You do not have the one crucial part required to finish the project.
The first corollary to Law 2: You will not discover which crucial part you are missing until you have turned off all the water to your house and have reached a point in your project at which you cannot turn the water back on until you are finished.
The second corollary to Law 2: Everyone else was missing the same part, and got to the plumbing store before you did. Thankfully, with today’s Internet, you can get online and discover that the part is available in another store. But the other store is in Milwaukee, and shipping will take seven to 10 days.
The third corollary to Law 2: Your plumber probably has the part in his van.
There is a Third Natural Law of DIY Plumbing that applies to jobs that involve replacing damaged old pipes: The pipes to which they are attached are even older, and your work on the new pipe will cause them to disintegrate.
Nevertheless, as I consider attacking a new project, I remind myself: plumbers are expensive.
Read Matthew Claxton’s Painful Truth at LangleyAdvance.com